This is something I wrote when I was feeling really down and out.
To Stay Among the Living
I slowly cry myself to sleep, because of all of the pain I feel. Nothing I do can make the pain go away. It just makes it worse. I don’t know how to stop it. So I will just keep crying myself to sleep./ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living./ Nobody cares about how I’m feeling. Nobody cares if I live or die./ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living./ So as I take my last breath and say my last good bye. I end all my pain and suffering with one bullet waiting to be lodged in my temple./ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living./ I start to pull the trigger and have second thoughts about what I am doing. Is it really worth it? Should I end everything? Or should I put the gun down?/ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living. I put the gun down and start to cry. I was so close to death, so close to ending everything for good. But something inside me told me that I had made the right decision. That I have a reason to keep on living./ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living./ I go on living my life. Cherishing every moment. Living life to the fullest./ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living./ I still have my brush with death in the back of my mind. It scares me. How close I was to death. I know there are so many others who end it. And I know that there are others that I can save. I don’t want anyone else to go through what I had to./ To stay among the living. To just try for one more day. And live the life I was supposed to. And stay among the living./ To stay among the living.
Monday, June 30, 2008
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